THE GIFT OF FAMILY LIFE AS A TOOL FOR BUILDING THE CHURCH

The Gift of Family Life as a Tool for Building the Church

Family is the natural offshoot of marriage, an institution of God Himself. In the beginning, God blessed marriage, and in His redemption promise, God ordained the blessing of all families. It is not mere coincidence that the salvation of humanity through Christ Jesus is linked with the blessing of the family. The human race has come to love the institution in all its forms and it has exerted unparalleled influence throughout the ages, such as dominating rulership as dynasties, and being the most suitable nickname even for the church.

A. The Nature and Purpose of the Family 

1) Family Defined: Nuclear (Husband, Wife Children only), Extended (All relatives)and Familiar references. NB: Focus on the nuclear family alone (usually called household in the Bible), is neither natural nor Biblical. The extended family must also be cared for.

2) Purpose of the Family: A vehicle for passing on God’s love, even unto redemption

B. The Gift of Family Life (How the world usually sees family life)

1) Companionship: To keep one another company

2) Procreation potential: To bring forth children to continue the family line

3) Safety net for raising children: 

4) Complimentary or shared resources: all the family have some property in common and can fall on one another in times of need

C. Divine Injunctions and Promises to the Family (God’s Mind about the Family Goes Further than B above): 

1) To be fruitful and multiply – Genesis 1:28

2) To be blessed through Abraham’s seed – Genesis 12: 3

3) To raise a Godly heritage and Nurture God’s People – Malachi 2:15, 1 Corinthians 7:14)

4) Blessing and Life Forevermore ordained where they dwell in peace – Psalm 133

5) If one is saved all is saved – Acts 16:31

6) The Family is to be held in trust by the faithful – 1 Timothy 3:5; 5:8

D. Attacks on the Family and Christian Responses

1) All attacks on marriage are indirectly attacks on the blessing of family life

i. Fornication and Co-habitation (Avoid and Discourage)

ii. Perverted marriages, eg. Homosexual couple, multiple marriages (Avoid)

iii. Divorce and the things that lead to it such as

a) Childlessness - The indirect case of Elkanah and Hannah (1 Sam. 1: 8) and Abraham, Sarah and Hagar (Gen. 16:1-6) (Encourage only standard medication and complete surrender to the will of God who may withhold this kind of blessing for His own purposes)

b) Conflicts and Quarrels (Resolve or help resolve peacefully)

c) Third party interference (Discourage, and recommend personal prayer)

d) Adultery (Avoid, but if occurs, encourage repentance and forgiveness)

2) Attacks on Parental Care: 

i. Discrimination or Favoritism – The indirect case of Esau and Jacob (Parents should avoid this completely)

ii. Unbalanced Care for Economic versus Spiritual Needs of children (Seek balance, as you are training your children to lead the church)

3) Attacks on Sibling Relations

i. Unhealthy Competition leading to jealousy if unchecked (Encourage to be one another’s keeper, which is more blessed)

4) Attacks on the Extended Family: Parents soon become grandparents and siblings become uncles and nieces. By and large these family relations and more are maintained across all cultures and family members demonstrate good disposition one toward the other, and they form a large safety net of care. Of course, there is a general weakening of family bonds as lineage tracing gets longer. However, extended family members can also quickly develop into sworn enemies over the following:

i. Perceived aberration in parentage or parent rivalry due to multiple marriages or marital infidelity (Counsel those affected to be content with what they have and rather seek God as their Father)

ii. Unresolved inheritance disputes (Help to resolve generously and selflessly)

iii. Perceived Infractions of cultural taboos (Stay away from what is sin against God gently point out dangers to family members when they ask you)

E. The Role of the Family in Building the Church

1) Jesus’ Parents and Siblings

i. His Father

ii. His Mother

iii. James and Jude, His junior brothers (Mt. 13:55, Gal. 1:19, James 1:1, Jude 1)

2) Family Influence in Conversions – Members of the extended family: Nieces and nephews would easily take you as a parent and come under your influence with little suspicion. Some are even brought to live with you on vacation and for education. Being a total parent across the extended family is an excellent opportunity to present the nature of Christ to them, that He loves all and doesn’t discriminate. This would help them make positive decisions for Christ. 

3) Family Responsibility in Discipleship – “Pass it on to Your children”: The Word of God to Israel concerning how they were to pass on His Law to their children is direct and clear. Responsibility for teaching the law to the next generation was firmly entrusted to parents and not the Scribes or even the Priests (Deut. 4:10; 6: 4-9).